missed darn full moon party at rasta bar, oh well

so the train, yes that glorious hunk of steel i love so much with all it's beauty and splendor n stuff. we got on the train and made it out of bangkok on pure fumes. it was wonderful though. at this point we survived on a series of power naps and it wasn't the end of that. we fell asleep and then awoke to a bottle of sangsom which was a delightful treat! i love roosting in the doorway of the cars while whizzing steadily through the fields and jungle. seeing buddha's pass by at 60-90k and saying hi to all the dogs along the way. there was plenty of food from locals at stops to keep me going with this horrible habit of not really sleeping. it's hard when you never actually sit in your life to sit this long. i'm serious folks! freakin impossible is more like it. anyways, in the morning i have my rice porridge from a local at a stop and then charity gets hungry so we go to the dining car that nobody seems to know exist. i'm sure i spoke of it before but you have benches and tables which can be very nice indeed. they had no chili and the only thing we could get to season her porridge was black pepper. it was bland but edible minus the meat in it which was almost as bad as the time i was hopping trains through fort worth in the summer and got a roast beef sandwich with the last change i had. after devouring most of it i noticed on the wrapper it was ham...i assumed roast beef from the color of the meat. yeah, you get the idea. anyhow, a couple of naps and some beautiful jungle later, we made it to chiang mai! wait it was actually lampung but we thought it was chiang mai. ok one hour or so to go and we made it! whew! we go down to rathvithi with taarna to exchange currency and take her to internet cafe so she could find the place she was staying. then continued onto our guest house, mountain view. the room we sequestered was not the taj mahal i had last time but more of a four seasons. the laundry area was outside our window and the street to the other. still, we had a hot shower piped in and an amazingly comfortable bed. i was craving my old room though, 21, the room of solace. but at this point it was time to eat and get ready for the initial dentist visit the following day. so we headed down to the fantastic reality of the night market because i HAD to have charity try the best mango lassi in the world. which unfortunately wasn't there anymore. so we go searching for food in a tourist paradise while once again being reminded that thailand while being the land of smiles, is also the land of useless clutter and plastic. i swear you get more plastic bags than shwegmanns gave you in new orleans. getting a bottle of water, two, getting take away rice and chicken, six. fascinating, really, oh did i mention that i can't stand bne. ugh, what and eyesore. i know he is from s.f. too so it's close to home the disrespect he put forth here. anyways, time to visit the tantalizing night food market and discover the best pork buns on the planet which happen to be right across from the guest house and i am eating two now. ok prepare for dentist. so it shall begin.
we woke up in the morning took the first of three showers for the day, which i might add is necessary to be polite due to the fact thai people don't sweat and therefore we stinky americans, which is quite factual, really, smell your armpit, ok. it also cools you down quite well. where was i? oh yes, showering, we showered laid under the fan for a minute ( best fans here) and went out for breakfast at blue diamond. i love this place for breakfast. it's expensive (like 90B/2.75us a meal) but well worth it. the owners are smart people. they not only built a healthy place to eat but marketed it so well. props to them. from there we hit wawee coffee for some gaa-faa yen (gah-fey yen) or iced coffee and headed to a couple of wats. then went and got some lunch and hit the guest house for another shower and minute of solace. which we received because i got our room switched out to the old one! so happy about that. from there it was time to trollop to the gentle land of grace dental clinic. i found out that i wasn't going with the original plan at all. i am going to work towards some implants (which means i come back again!) and i was going to come back for gum surgery at 6.30. no big deal right? charity got seen and had two fillings replaced and is getting four more done and her wisdom teeth out (two are cracked). she is also getting a cleaning! her input was they were very gentle and considerate of her. which i knew would be the case. so we leave there and i take us the wrong way to trying to find lanna coffee so we catch a sawngtheaw to the big mall instead seeing as lanna isn't open (anymore?). we go shop around for nothing really and get some chocolate sticks (basically croissant) and coffee buns (stupidly delightful) at mr. bun my favorite little bakery stand after i already indulge in dairy queen., something i wouldn't be caught dead doing at home. then we head across the street to a turkish coffee place. yes, turkish coffee, who knew? we enjoyed it while resting for about an hour and had the owner read us our fortunes from the grounds. apparently i am holding onto a problem from the past that is associated with a relic. he hopes my problem ends soon. i am still wondering what it could be. i honestly don't know how some of these places stay open when i never see anyone else at them. side business im sure but still. mind boggling. anyhow, we walk back ot the dentist getting there right on time and i go in. it turns out that i need about an hour and a half for the surgery which involved stretching my gum's out on all my front teeth. i didn't know that meant cutting my gum's away from my mouth behind and in front of my teeth and then sewing them up all along the inside. bloody mess that it was. still they did good and i have no pain. but two and a half hours later i am glad charity waited for me because i went out of the room and fell out almost. i sat down and was burning up and sweating but my body was cold and clammy, super light-headed which i was having a hard time describing to the short staff that was there waiting for me to finish and a bit overwhelmed with the work done in my mouth. i had some orange juice and got better. we went back via tuk tuk to the guesthouse and got some food and leo beer. sat down and indulged before my continuation of fixing the accident continued. that being antibiotics again. fortunately the reason i had the surgery was my front teeth were still good enough to save for implants later which will make the process faster and cheaper. i also have a protective covering on both sides of my gums that charity says look like a mouthguard but i think more resembles silly putty in my mouth. really, put a newspaper to my upper grill and you could copy the funny pages. i am also going to get a temporary plate for my upper mandible so that it will be full of teeth th\us making it easier for me to eat in the future. exciting, yes, it is. time for bed and relaxation, we passed out watching heroes on my nokia 810.
let me take a moment of silence for the herbed whiskey bar and it's wonderful joyn it brought many a person. we will miss you.
today we walked to breakfast and i went to exchange currency on the way. went in bank and they don't take travelers cheques. i got annoyed because i had signed it already thus making it harder for me to cash in. but i changed in a twenty and we walked to blue diamond out of the way. i lead us down the wrong soi. hunger makes me forgetful. really. i like to emphasize with the word really it seems. i never knew that about myself, huh. then we walked to exchange and to my optometrist. i got new glasses and sunglasses (thanks for convincing me charity)armani glasses at that. i'm fashionable, what! it was like $230 for two sets of nice prescription glasses and one eye is near sighted the other far on me so the lenses take more. still not too bad and all the dental work and 2.5 hours of surgery yesterday was $286us. that's for both of us. so i got my morning bag of fresh mango and dealt with the tuk tuk drivers wanting to take us to tiger kingdom oh so badly and went for iced coffee. then caught a sawngtheaw to this place called kao soi prince on the otherside of the river for some amazing soup. holy cow i was in taste bud heaven. you ahve to go here. maybe even fly here eat soup go home. really kow soi is the bestest in the eastest. then we went to warorot market and got some locks for our lockers at home in the studio (which we moved two days before we left) and a new small machete as well as some other trinkets at the outside market. continued on inside for dried mango and sleeping clothes and chili oh my. it is crazy in there. another must on my list of them. from there we continued down the flower market which consist of, you guessed it tons of flower stand and decorations for business and buddha. which created beautiful in my book and smells amazing. went to tha phae road and to the wat with donald duck eating noodle i spoke of before. this time i explored the wat further and ended up having a monk come and call me into a room for a blessing. he told me that i would live a hundred years and that i have had lots of accidents. then he prayed to buddha and blessed me on my journey through life and said no more accidents. i got a weaved bracelet with a little buddha in it to guide me on the path. we walked back to pick up my glasses from the optometrist on rathvithi, i don't have the name handy but i will later. they rock, go there for all your visionary needs, and came back to guest house, it rained all day. i went to get us food, fried fish n rice for charity and green curry with scallops for me. oh and pork buns. of course. i have been buying stuff and ordering food in thai so when i ordered the curry the lady gave it to me and said 25 baht but her friend said no hes farang charge him 30 and she did. hey, what can you do. it was enough for two meals. less than a dollar and delicious, indeed. now i am here and about to go back to sleep. so if this makes no sense it is because i am not totally awake. oh, tomorrow we go to chiang rai and then more dental antics on teh 13th. keep on checking and i'll keep on typing, 10-4 over and out....

missed darn full moon party at rasta bar, oh well

so the train, yes that glorious hunk of steel i love so much with all it's beauty and splendor n stuff. we got on the train and made it out of bangkok on pure fumes. it was wonderful though. at this point we survived on a series of power naps and it wasn't the end of that. we fell asleep and then awoke to a bottle of sangsom which was a delightful treat! i love roosting in the doorway of the cars while whizzing steadily through the fields and jungle. seeing buddha's pass by at 60-90k and saying hi to all the dogs alonmg the way. there was plenty of food from locals at stops to keep me going with this horrible habit of not really sleeping. it's hard when you never actually sit in your life to sit this long. i'm serious folks! freakin impossible is more like it. anyways, in the morning i have my rice porridge from a local at a stop and then charity gets hungry so we go to the dining car that nobody seems to know exist. i'm sure i spoke of it before but you have benches and tables which can be very nice indeed. they had no chili and the only thing we could get to season her porridge was black pepper. it was bland but edible minus the meat in it which was almost as bad as the time i was hopping trains through fort worth in the summer and got a roast beef sandwich with the last change i had. after devouring most of it i noticed on the wrapper it was ham...i assumed roast beef from the color of the meat. yeah, you get the idea. anyhow, a couple of naps and some beautiful jungle later, we made it to chiang mai! wait it was actually lampung but we thought it was chiang mai. ok one hour or so to go and we made it! whew! we go down to rathvithi with taarna to exchange currency and take her to internet cafe so she could find the place she was staying. then continued onto our guest house, mountain view. the room we sequestered was not the taj mahal i had last time but more of a four seasons. the laundry area was outside our window and the street to the other. still, we had a hot shower piped in and an amazingly comfortable bed. i was craving my old room though, 21, the room of solace. but at this point it was time to eat and get ready for the initial dentist visit the following day. so we headed down to the fantastic reality of the night market because i HAD to have charity try the best mango lassi in the world. which unfortunately wasn't there anymore. so we go searching for food in a tourist paradise while once again being reminded that thailand while being the land of smiles, is also the land of useless clutter and plastic. i swear you get mroe plastic bags than shwegmanns gave you in new orleans. getting a bottle of water, two, getting take away rice and chicken, six. fascinating, really, oh did i mention that i can't stand bne. ugh, what and eyesore. i know he is from s.f. too so it's close to home the disrespect he put forth here. anyways, time to visit the tantalizing night food market and discover the best pork buns on the planet which happen to be right across from the guest house and i am eating two now. ok prepare for dentist. so it shall begin.
we woke up in the morning took the first of three showers for the day, which i might add is necessary to be polite due to the fact thai people don't sweat and therefore we stinky americans, which is quite factual, really, smell your armpit, ok. it also cools you down quite well. where was i? oh yes, showering, we showered laid under the fan for a minute ( best fans here) and went out for breakfast at blue diamond. i love this place for breakfast. it's expensive (like 90B/2.75us a meal) but well worth it. the owners are smart people. they not only built a healthy place to eat but marketed it so well. props to them. from there we hit wawee coffee for some gaa-faa yen (gah-fey yen) or iced coffee and headed to a couple of wats. then went and got some lunch and hit the guest house for another shower and minute of solace. which we received because i got our room switched out to the old one! so happy about that. from there it was time to trollop to the gentle land of grace dental clinic. i found out that i wasn't going with the original plan at all. i am going to work towards some implants (which means i come back again!) and i was going to come back for gum surgery at 6.30. no big deal right? charity got seen and had two fillings replaced and is getting four more done and her wisdom teeth out (two are cracked). she is also getting a cleaning! her input was they were very gentle and considerate of her. which i knew would be the case. so we leave there and i take us the wrong way to trying to find lanna coffee so we catch a sawngtheaw to the big mall instead seeing as lanna isn't open (anymore?). we go shop around for nothing really and get some chocolate sticks (basically croissant) and coffee buns (stupidly delightful) at mr. bun my favorite little bakery stand after i already indulge in dairy queen., something i wouldn't be caught dead doing at home. then we head across the street to a turkish coffee place. yes, turkish coffee, who knew? we enjoyed it while resting for about an hour and had the owner read us our fortunes from the grounds. apparently i am holding onto a problem from the past that is associated with a relic. he hopes my problem ends soon. i am still wondering what it could be. i honestly don't know how some of these places stay open when i never see anyone else at them. side business im sure but still. mind boggling. anyhow, we walk back ot the dentist getting there right on time and i go in. it turns out that i need about an hour and a half for the surgery which involved stretching my gum's out on all my front teeth. i didn't know that meant cutting my gum's away from my mouth behind and in front of my teeth and then sewing them up all along the inside. bloody mess that it was. still they did good and i have no pain. but two and a half hours later i am glad charity waited for me because i went out of the room and fell out almost. i sat down and was burning up and sweating but my body was cold and clammy, super light-headed which i was having a hard time describing to the short staff that was there waiting for me to finish and a bit overwhelmed with the work done in my mouth. i had some orange juice and got better. we went back via tuk tuk to the guesthouse and got some food and leo beer. sat down and indulged before my continuation of fixing the accident continued. that being antibiotics again. fortunately the reason i had the surgery was my front teeth were still good enough to save for implants later which will make the process faster and cheaper. i also have a protective covering on both sides of my gums that charity says look like a mouthguard but i think more resembles silly putty in my mouth. really, put a newspaper to my upper grill and you could copy the funny pages. i am also going to get a temporary plate for my upper mandible so that it will be full of teeth th\us making it easier for me to eat in the future. exciting, yes, it is. time for bed and relaxation, we passed out watching heroes on my nokia 810.
let me take a moment of silence for the herbed whiskey bar and it's wonderful joyn it brought many a person. we will miss you.
today we walked to breakfast and i went to exchange currency on the way. went in bank and they don't take travelers cheques. i got annoyed because i had signed it already thus making it harder for me to cash in. but i changed in a twenty and we walked to blue diamond out of the way. i lead us down the wrong soi. hunger makes me forgetful. really. i like to emphasize with the word really it seems. i never knew that about myself, huh. then we walked to exchange and to my optometrist. i got new glasses and sunglasses (thanks for convincing me charity)armani glasses at that. i'm fashionable, what! it was like $230 for two sets of nice prescription glasses and one eye is near sighted the other far on me so the lenses take more. still not too bad and all the dental work and 2.5 hours of surgery yesterday was $286us. that's for both of us. so i got my morning bag of fresh mango and dealt with the tuk tuk drivers wanting to take us to tiger kingdom oh so badly and went for iced coffee. then caught a sawngtheaw to this place called kao soi prince on the otherside of the river for some amazing soup. holy cow i was in taste bud heaven. you ahve to go here. maybe even fly here eat soup go home. really kow soi is the bestest in the eastest. then we went to warorot market and got some locks for our lockers at home in the studio (which we moved two days before we left) and a new small machete as well as some other trinkets at the outside market. continued on inside for dried mango and sleeping clothes and chili oh my. it is crazy in there. another must on my list of them. from there we continued down the flower market which consist of, you guessed it tons of flower stand and decorations for business and buddha. which created beautiful in my book and smells amazing. went to tha phae road and to the wat with donald duck eating noodle i spoke of before. this time i explored the wat further and ended up having a monk come and call me into a room for a blessing. he told me that i would live a hundred years and that i have had lots of accidents. then he prayed to buddha and blessed me on my journey through life and said no more accidents. i got a weaved bracelet with a little buddha in it to guide me on the path. we walked back to pick up my glasses from the optometrist on rathvithi, i don't have the name handy but i will later. they rock, go there for all your visionary needs, and came back to guest house, it rained all day. i went to get us food, fried fish n rice for charity and green curry with scallops for me. oh and pork buns. of course. i have been buying stuff and ordering food in thai so when i ordered the curry the lady gave it to me and said 25 baht but her friend said no hes farang charge him 30 and she did. hey, what can you do. it was enough for two meals. less than a dollar and delicious, indeed. now i am here and about to go back to sleep. so if this makes no sense it is because i am not totally awake. oh, tomorrow we go to chiang rai and then more dental antics on teh 13th. keep on checking and i'll keep on typing, 10-4 over and out....

bkk to chiang mai and surgery make me wet from rain

so here we go i have alot of ground to cover and only socks on so this may be a two parter. the flight from taipei was way more involved with a t.v screen and seats to ourselves. i watched some show about coffee and discovered not only is it good for you but if you devour dark chocolate before hand it is even healthier. so there, in your face. i knew i was right all this time! if you happen to be flying into taipei which if headed to southeast asia you probably will be i have to recommend that you see what terminal you crashed into because if it's terminal 2 go get some food and a token from the bookstore for you free chair massage versus terminal 1 where you can get coffee for $3.50us. but once you cross terminal's there is no crossing back, for real! another incredible moment in airport history was flushing the toilet in taipei and having sanitizer spray out of the button you pressed into the wall. for a country that names its busses hope line and such they also would pass mary poppins test of cleanliness without hesitation. let me also point out that they now offer filtered water for free at stands throughout the terminal (sounds like an illness) thruway and at the gates so save or bring your own bottle. i bring my metal bottle empty and fill it in the airports so that i dont have to spend $20 on water for the continuation of travel. be sure to empty it before you go through security in taipei though because they dont' like it when it is still full and make you drink it all on teh spot (whew). we arrived at suvarnabhumi airport in Krung Thep Mahanakhon Amon Rattanakosin Mahinthara Ayuthaya Mahadilok Phop Noppharat Ratchathani Burirom Udomratchaniwet Mahasathan Amon Piman Awatan Sathit Sakkathattiya Witsanukam Prasit (กรุงเทพมหานคร อมรรัตนโกสินทร์ มหินทรายุธยามหาดิลก ภพนพรัตน์ ราชธานีบุรีรมย์ อุดมราชนิเวศน์ มหาสถาน อมรพิมาน อวตารสถิต สักกะทัตติยะ วิษณุกรรมประสิทธิ์) aka bangkok. customs was a breeze and we were sleep deprived and starving. so we went immediately to hualamphong satanii rot fai and tried to get our overnight sleeper express tickets to chiang mai. unfortunately it was sold out and we got second class seats for teh 15 hour train ride. after enduring the last twenty plus hours of plane sitting on the train made us all sigh with exasperation. but hey whatcha gonna do. we traveled thai style instead of the farang fancy pants way. so charity once again exclaimed, "good morning asia!" and we went to get soup which was delicious and i remembered that i love thailand. so our next mission was to walk to khao san road so that we could find food for taarna who is vegan. in which its easier wining the ring toss at the fair six times over than finding something vegan. really. so we start our journey of six hours of walking through bangkok getting numerous directions the wrong way and we could have made it there but went the other direction! holy crap now what. we are exhausted, we haven't slept due to the plane, have only eaten a bowl of soup. it's hotter than concentrated habanero oil and we have to get to khao san. so we get a cab. hell yeah we are there right? we get dropped off, at klong san. oppps, grammatical errors which are both humorous and horrific at their best. so we get another cab and make it there. hell yeah, welcome to the grateful dead lot in thailand. really, it's horrible. i'm having a little spit-up purge its way onto the back of my tongue now just thinking about it. blech. what's even worse than that. we just fought tooth and nail to get there. funny after a dozen people and three cabs we finally made it to teh place we couldn't wait to escape. yay westernization. we ended up taking a tuk tuk back to the train station which was fun though.
on a side note there is a "artist" "tagger" "canvasser" known as bne. you are a asshole. i hope i never meet you because i am so agitated with you. everywhere near the train station in bkk we saw your stupid sticker "bne was here" every five damn feet. then we get to chiang mai and in all the tourist areas again every five feet one or two stickers. i like the idea of reclaiming the streets against propaganda and advertising but you are worse than coke and ipod put together. not only that but you are a complete eyesore and totally disrespectful to a country that is more than hospitable to you. i'm so tired of your infantile stickers, it's like you are a male dog and pissing on every post and booth that you can. get over yourself.
i am out of time and will write more later about the state railway of thailand and chiang mai as well as my first day at the dentist which involved major surgery. all this and more so keep your pants on the ride has just begun...

taipei before opening/china air

so we ade it to taipei but are in terminal 1. so no massage or johnny walker blue lounge. we do have w coffees for 7 bux us and muffins from arizmendi. china air was way lees entertaining than previous jaunts. no tv no slippers and the guy we hoped doesnt have the flu puking beside us. sounds like home doesnt it. we did finally have rice porridge and charity is repeating good morning asia over n over. we fly into bkk at 11am then get train tix and head out for food. hell yeah best food ever. so i am preparing to be stared at for three weeks and pratice speakin thai to people who want to speak english. all that and some kratooey bars and im in water buffalo heaven. i cant wait for the,humidity summer finally none of this 45 degree oaklane crap. here i come mouth....chook di!

up up n out of this mofo

i leavin on a jet plane, i know when i'll be back again. so bags are packed, dogs are fed, money is in hand, dentist is ready and i'm freakin hungry. went out for burgers last night to say farewell to the cuisine of the america's and gettin gready for the gourmet delights of china airlines, mmmm mmm good. i especially like hte strange jellyesque desert with solid color lines in it. what the hell is that i am eating? i enjoy stuffing my mouth with indescribable foodstuffs on occasion though. like last time i was there and ate the fried whatever the hell it was with blue and green and red meat in it as well as some sort of vegetable of which i couldn't describe or the silk worms in my green curry, hell yeah! here i come for movies in the big mall and pretending i can't understand the numbers spoken in thai when exhibiting the bargaining skills necessary. i can count up to a million (see sib) and seeing as i dont have shit for money that shouldn't be too necessary. so if any of you want to deposit your paycheck in my account leave a message and i'll get back to you! HAH! holy crap im going ot thailand in a few hours. be ready for upcoming entries including the siriraj hospitals forensic museum otherwise known as the corpse museum. seeing as we fly into bangkok at 5.30 are going to buy our train tickets and then ramble about in complete delirium. so wish us luck and kiss your saint christopher, we gonna fly on up out of here. oh yeah, remember your passport wick

medical tourism dental end again, thailand part 2

so here we go again on the road to recovery and further chewing insurance in the latter years of my misquoted life. tomorrow i embark on that long road to thailand. i got a good pair of shoes and am ready to leave them at home for the same ridiculous pair of teva's that look like a stencil on my feet. we are flying into bangkok on the fourth and begin the journey into the depths of our molars on the sixth. i say we because my most beloved fiance is gracing me with her presence and experiences for me to write about at the same dentist ( http://www.gracedentalclinic.com/ ), again that dentist is grace dental clinic in chiang mai! the best for us of course. also if you end up there chiang mai ram hospital is top o the line. we have chocolate and pirate booty onboard with us. well we always have pirate booty with us but i meant the food, get yer head out my drawers! this after 3,000 miles with a 3.5 yr old boy and we are ready for some time in the land of dreams. i am ready with two camera's, a journal, a nokia 810 and two field recorders so i don't miss a thing for y'all, i will post photo links on flickr (rules) upon my return. itenerary is dentist until the 13th atleast and then we head for some exploration and end up in ko tao in a bungalow on the beach. brilliant, yes we are, you should emulate us whenever you need some brilliance in your life as well. so keep your eyes watered and your curiosity on the tip of your tongue and i'll be sure to mesmerize the pupils and burn the buds with some thai spice and broken english. remember the cautious one ponders while the fool crosses the bridge and pink slippers go great with breakfast burritos or whatever it is i am trying to say......stay tuned....what!

reality is merely an illusion, although a very persistent one-einstein

reality is merely an illusion, although a very persistent one. -einstein
Current mood: thoughtful
Category: Quiz/Survey

it's is intriguing to me the changes between urban sprawl aka cities near and far. the reality of feeling overly/rightfully vigilant when in downtown oakland wondering if one of the cops i snapped photos of will notice me and then i too will go down for having an opinion. traveling from acts of civil unrest in downtown to people walking their dogs, eating ice cream, and buying $300 shirts in rockridge at the same moment in time. these people completely oblivious to the anger, concern, and cry for justice in the air a mere 4.3 miles away. yet, the only opinion they receive is that of violence and destruction from the corporate media they trust in. to hear people talk about that poor officer and his family. how absurd it is for people to make his life harder than it already is now. i mean he turned himself in right? after a laundromat debate with these "individuals" i come to one conclusion. fuck them (which is the same they come to for me which is one basis on the division of classes) for not having their opinion but that of another that they tag-along with so as to not have to process for their own selves. the same people who can't wait in a line without calling or text messaging someone not to avoid their thoughts but i believe because they don't know how to think any longer. i care more about properly steamed milk than which side they are on. so long as they have some compassion for their backings. i feel like midget in a basketball game when i am in that atmosphere. as though i am a shadow with a unique shape so as to grab a glances worth of attention. atleast i can take out their knees right? it amazes me how our lives are so separated. yet many of our daily goals are the same. ow much emphases is based upon your income and place of residence versus character and respectabiity. now i am here in steamboat springs, colorado and to go out to get a cup of coffee i have to spend 6 minutes getting prepared for the elements outside. shoveling snow and having cars spray slush on your face. winter. it sometimes escapes my reality. yet i feel it is important to experience it yearly especially since spring is squatting my backyard already in the paradise of west oakland.
one the state of the world affairs while i find it astounding that obama was elected by the amerikan populace i am highly skeptical of his "change" for instance closing guantanamo and shipping the prisoners elsewhere. part of me says, "wow, this guy may actually do something." while my conspiricist in me says, "welcome to the face of the nwo, bush set us up for martial law and the people can now be blinded with what their televisions or computers say to do yet the background of it all is entirely corrupt." i think what happens with the us government, economy, and foreign relations would be the same no matter who won the presidential election. i mean come on now. you can't make a cherry tree produce apples if you put it in different soil. a cherry tree will always be a cherry tree now matter what you plant it in. a puppet is a puppet. i am just happy to feel that amerikans are more open minded racially than i anticipated them to be. this somehow turned into a rant. go figure. the best i can do myself is pay close attention to that which ails me and do my best to turn that around. if it's too large to turn around i can use it to work torwards making myself better. change begins and ends with yourself. while external energies may influence it is up to you ultimately to make right for yourself. i feel like were going to have to fight for that sooner than we think.

premise 14 from endgame by derrick jensen read by me during the inauguration. (which felt strange listening to while reading this incredible book!)
from birth on-and probably from conception, but i'm not sure how i'd make the case- we are individually and collectively enculturated to hate life, hate the natural world, hate the wild, hate wild animals, hate women, hate children, hate our bodies, hate and fear our emotions, hate ourselves. if we did not hate the world, we could not allow it to be destroyed before our eyes. if we did not hate ourselves, we could not allow our homes- our bodies- to be poisoned.....


more to come...